- "A HAIRPIN, A HOE, A HACKSAW, A HOLE IN THE GROUND" (Batman) Joker is bored with all his riches and thinks the comedians on the radio and TV are hacks so he decides to write a book, or a whole volume of books on comedy so he will be remembered as THE authority on the subject. things are quiet as he starts but for his next chapter, he robs a jewelry store and only takes an old lady's hairpin. next, he steals a hacksaw from a mechanic and a ho from a farm, which he uses to steal a hole in the ground, specifically the first hole at the Winne-Kon-Toh golf club. Batman figures out the names of the stolen items are mimicking Joker's signature laugh (ha-ha-ho-ho) and the Joker sends a record to the GCPD warning him to watch for the echo. Batman figures that mean they are looking for 2 words ending in ah and 2 words ending in oh. he thinks the first 2 words refer to the visiting Maharajah of Mimpah but it's not till the next morning when he read that the Maharajah will be playing golf at Winne-Koh-Toh that he realizes Joker is after his golden clubs. Joker has set a teargas bomb in the first hole using the hairpin as a trigger and the dynamic duo show up just a little too late to stop him but they give chase and are lead to a novelty factory. Joker's men hold guns on our heroes and are ordered to blast them but it turns out they were only water guns, a fight ensues and Robin picks up one of the water guns in hopes of getting prints off it for their files. Joker gets the drop on them with a rope, tying them up and one of his men suggests seeing who Batman really is but Joker prefers to preserve the mystery so they can keep having thrilling battles of wits. he gives them a choice of 2 doors, saying one leads to freedom the other doom. they chose the wrong door but are able to escape thanks to the water gun robin picked up. again, the Joker holds our heroes at gunpoint but his loud laughter echoes thru the building and the vibrations knock a giant comedy mask down on his head.
- "THE PORTRAIT OF DOOM" (Batman) a man with an innocent face sits for a portrait then kills the artist when he refuses to sell it to him. the artist curses him so as he commits evil the portrait will change to reflect that evil.
- "BATMAN UNDER THE SEA" (Batman) after having some fun speculating that an odd man in a wheelchair might be a merman Bruce and Dick realize the man he is with is a known gangster so they follow them to the waterfront as batman and robin. renting a boat to follow them out to sea they are shot at and the boat sunk. Batman goes down with it and has a dream he was turned into a merman himself.
- DAFFY & DOODLE (humor strip)
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